1. My Top Model debut went well. I wasn't edited to be the fat-hating tyrant my mother worried I would be, and I managed to watch it with a minimum of cringe moments – though "Hi girls!" is pretty much impossible to say like a normal person when the cameras are rolling. However: I did have to strongly disagree with Jacqueline Smith's description of me as "notoriously obtuse" in the New Zealand Herald. Notoriously obtuse? Come on! I would have accepted: notoriously charming, witty, insightful or self-adulatory, but obtuse? Ridiculous. I only hope it was a malapropism, in which case someone should have consulted a dictionary before using a big word.
2. Gentlemen: when in doubt, go back to basics – a white button down shirt, plain colour wool sweater, blue or grey blazer and pants. Solid colours and classic shapes work every single time. Here's a quick colour formula: White goes with everything; so does grey and navy blue; maroon and beige is an amazing combination, as is navy and beige; dark military green is awesome with navy, beige and grey; green and red generally looks like you're trying to pull off Christmas Elf-chic; navy blue is always better than black.
3. Going sockless isn't the picnic everybody makes it out to be. I've managed to dodge blisters just one of the five times I've done it. The secret (for me, at least) seems to be multiple band aids and stuffing make up remover pads in the heels of the shoes – but even that isn't fail safe. Next stop, loafer socks.
4. Don't let the bastards get you down.
5. Philosophical question of the week: how does one live in the present? I'm always so concerned with future plans and the greener grass and the final bite of the chocolate bar that I don't think I appreciate what's happening right now as much as I should. Any advice would be muchly appreciated.
6. As someone who has burnt a lot of bridges in his time (but now is a born again pacifist), I can say from personal experience that unnecessary conflict is not worth the energy. Let it go. There were times when I'd walk into a party and literally be beefing with like 10 people in the room – generally because of something that I'd written. You don't always have to be right. Relationships trump self-righteousness 10 times out of 10.
7. If you don't know Put This On, get in the game. Those guys are brilliant. Their final webisode of the series saw them take on the annual meeting of New York's Corduroy Appreciation Club (hilarity ensues); and interview the writer of my favourite profile of all time, journalist Gay Talese, about his philosophy on style. In his words, "I always dressed up for the story... which is to say I elevated my style to the point where I couldn't dress any better than I did."
8. Is it bad form to eat the leftovers from your roommate's dinner party (that you didn't attend) later that night when said roommate is asleep, and then not mention it the next day? If so, I might be in trouble.
9. You know what's not a good time? Angry drunks. If you have a tendency towards random outbursts of rage when you've been drinking, why don't you do the world a favour and not drink so GD much. Calling your friends and apologising every Sunday morning does not cut it. You know who you are.
10. I am currently trying to decide between heading straight to New York from Paris, or coming home for New Zealand Fashion Week and then going to New York. As far as I can tell going straight to New York will be exponentially better for my career, but if I don't come back for Fashion Week I feel like I'm letting the team down. What to do? What to do?
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